If I knew then, what I know now.

I am 39 years old and I sometimes wonder at how much my outlook has changed in the last 20 years. Today,  I am a 39 year old with the heart of a 19 year old; body, ummm not so much! 20 years ago, I was a 19 year old with the heart and mind of a 39 year old.

 So what would be different , 'If I knew then, what I know now??'


1) RELAX : I would loosen up! I would not take myself and others so seriously.  I wouldn't be caught up in the 'he said, she said' dilemma. I was once told by someone wise, 'Don't make a big deal about situations which will have no impact on your life, 10 years from now.' I would definitely follow that mantra.

2) Take more Risks : I was very cautious, I am still careful but not like what I used to be. I would definitely take more risks. I would allow myself to follow my heart more, allow myself to behave like a teenager, fall in love, go on a spending spree. I had the money but refused to spend it on myself. I would lessen my inhibitions, be more confident.

3) Get Wild : I was in college, a couple of thousand miles away from my parents, living on my own. But, I didn't allow myself to go wild. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed myself, made some great friends, lifelong bonds but I was , yes I am going to say it, a PRUDE!! Yes I was, and I would definitely change that. In college, you should get drunk, have wild, but safe, sex, take crazy road trips. Let yourself go wild.

4) Pass no judgements : I conducted myself with such high (HA!) principles that I held others to those yardsticks, as well. Its all such a waste of time and a waste of energy which could have been utilised better.

5) Be Smarter : I studied but not smartly. I wish I had been smart about how I studied, I would have definitely achieved more.

I still believe in being and behaving safe and responsible. I strongly believe in Safe sex, and definitely NO drinking and driving, but safe sex doesn't equal to no sex and no drinking and driving doesn't mean no drinking.

So, had I known then what I know now, I would chill, have that tequila shot, go flirt with the bartender and then ace the exam!